put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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