If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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