I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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