What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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