You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
