her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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