Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
