You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
