Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
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Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize