I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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