This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
