she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize