Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
My liver just had a heart attack.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize
