i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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