i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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