Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
