did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize