Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Randomize
