dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Randomize