just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
