my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize