If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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