I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
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