I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
