You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
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