what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
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someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
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He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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