Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
