Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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