I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
my phone needs a breathalizer
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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