it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize
