You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
