I love watching others lives come down to our level.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
She's not a foreskin expert like you
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
So. Much. Porn.
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