This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize