never play flip cup with pint glasses
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
