Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
