I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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