Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize