HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
