Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
