you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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