i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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