You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
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Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
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Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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