party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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