Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Why are your pants in the freezer?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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