it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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