You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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