Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I can't turn off my feet"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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