and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
