Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
