WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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