They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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